LADIES
When you are wearing your batti-floss (thongs) with your micro minis, please consider the person that maybe standing behind you on the escalator and remember you cannot bend over, you have to stoop lady like to keep your assets (backside) from being on display. Mercy, that is a little too much show and tell and it isn’t pretty if it dirty as hell.
The purpose of a bra is to LIFT & SEPERATE, not droop and slap down, its time for a new bra, preferable one that fits and lifts those bad boys up while separating them so they are not smooched together like potato in a pillow sack. Breast going competition with your belly top and caressing your navel is not attractive.
FELLAS (Men)
- Clip your nose hair, ears hair and the excessive hair hanging out your t-shirt like a wild bush on the prairie. Now looking up at a man and seeing his nose hair hallowing at yah is not a comforting experience, nor is looking at the hair hanging out his ears like the burning bush with little wax intertwined. Now the chest hair ok, i get it, you don’t have to shave it but trim it, tame it a little. I am not talking to the typical hairy chest man here, i am talking about the one with the chest hair so long it make his shirt look puffy like he got padding and it sticks out by the neck and it so long you can braid it.
- Smelling like a pack of cigarettes and coughing up a lung while you greeting hello is not charming. Now if you must smoke invest in some breath spray, some clothes deodorizer, something to take the smoke stench away
PEOPLE...
- Cover your mouth when you are yawning, i have no desire to see down your throat; i am neither your dentist nor your family physician. Now i know some of you are saying, well don’t look, now while you maybe right and have a point it is decidedly difficult to do so in a packed train/bus and there is little or no wiggle room. Besides it wont kill you to cover your mouth, I mean what’s your excuse? The only exceptions are hippopotamuses and I rarely encounter those on my journey to and from.
- Cover your nose and mouth when you sneeze please, snot is not en vogue (in fashion) and if it were i would much prefer to wear my own and i much rather take my showers in the privacy of my home, germs i can do without and viruses you can keep. It would be helpful if you walk with tissue, napkin, paper towels, towelette or any other piece of absorbent rag to catch your DNA residue.
I guess you all figured out by now that I don’t own a car so i am subject to all sorts of experiences using public transportation. While most of the somewhat unexpected experiences are amusing and mildly irritating there are some that are downright grotesques and just this side of too much to take. I mean going on the train and having it smell like ass is just a hurling experience and I often stand there trying not to breathe too deeply waiting in anticipation for the train to stop so i can quickly dash and to hop onto another car in hopes that this one has a more pleasant odour and i can breathe through my nose safely. Some days it takes doing that 2 or 3 times b4 victory can be claimed.
THERE ARE A FEW THINGS I HAVE LEARNT WHILE USING PUBLIC TRANSIT:
- Never sit without first looking on the seat
- Take the first available seat because it is not your living room and looking around for the best seat will mean not getting any and standing your entire journey.
- If the person you sitting by suddenly starts shouting random profanities and talking furiously with arms flaring, get up and as casually as possible make your way to the opposite side of the train, or bus, if train preferable change cars. If its an emergency situation call 911 from cell phone at a safe distance.
- Don’t expect all public transit workers to be nice, announce your stop, answer you or look at you, it is an assumption that can cost you dearly
- Don’t just put your bag anywhere; sometimes you may encounter unlikely things (discovered a syringe once, empty condom etc.)
- You can ask the person with there bag taking up a perfectly good seat to please move it so you can sit because you can bet they did not pay and extra fare for the bag.
- You can ask other travellers who are lying down or have their feet stretched out on other seats to please sit up since they are not home and the chairs are not lazy boys
- Always walk with air plugs to tune out people with very loud music that you can hear every syllable the singer is singing or screaming depending on the music
- All and all it makes for unique experiences and good story telling. If you have any experiences using public transportation please share it with me, after all communication is the key that unlocks the door to the world.
Peace.....Out
22TKY3YKUWPQ
My favorite public transit experiance started off rather unremarkably. A man in a suit got on the bus and sat down in front of me. Shortly after sitting down he started to talk in four different voices. I tuned in for the half an hour ride, and the entire time he played out four different characters who were on a space ship that had gone off course and was soon to crash into a planet ahead. I was sad to see him go, because I never found out what happened in the end.
ReplyDeleteHAHAH! LUFF IT! I LUFF IT!!!! LOL!
ReplyDeleteHow Old R U?U seem Aged :P LoL..Jk But 4 Real..Where DO U Get ThisShyt Frum On Here?
ReplyDelete>_____>well then… I suppose you want my opinion on stuff and whatnot…erright…wellity, you sure got…something goin on up there…your pics are…how you say…different… but good none the less…kthxbai
ReplyDeletehi, thx for visitingi enjoy your blog very much tooespecially these extremely useful advises about public transit, hehefor all of you in van, take bus 99B sometime around noon during weekdays if you ever get bored. the driver whistles french folk songs, and announces each stop twice (once in english and once in french) ^_^
ReplyDeletethanx for the advise, and you have a great space yourself, keep it up.
ReplyDeleteto answer your ?..a "sometime" boyfriend is exactly that…he is my boyfriend "sometimes" but we’re friends and luv eachother all the time. i’m an aries and really don’t like the idea of being locked up into anything…..(except a good bra…there really is no x-cuse for poor foundations…if they only knew that propper underwesr helps cut a slimming figure)!anyway, you seem nice, albiet serious…i don’t know how to be serious. maybe i’ll try it though, it seems fun…..
ReplyDeleteHiya Fabulicious Rhapsody!Great site, you have a way with words, and ‘street wisdom’! lolWhen I was younger and got my license, I already knew my way around the big cities thanks to the bus system… and if you’re into people watching, it’s the best!Thanks for havin’ me, see ya ’round, girly!
ReplyDeleteOh, I liked your little piece on the public transit system…being someone who depends on it (when I can’t bribe my mom to drive me places :P), I’ve seen my share of oddities. For example…-The guy who ingests a handful of pills and then stumbles onto the bus-Random people who decide to critique my art projects *"Well, if you darkened the stipling here…."*-Amazingly talkactive bus drivers who try to set people up in relationships *"Hey lookit here, she’s kinda cute, no?"*-And lastly, I once saw a guy run in front of the bus, in trffic, because he was upset that the bus was too crowded and he couldn’t get on. Those darn schools, them and their evil dependance on public transit because school buses are just too expensive now…P.S. Do you have any idea what to do about people who yell their entire life story out on their cell phones? If I have to hear another heartbreak horror story, I just might scream…
ReplyDeletelmfao, i’m so gad i live in a smaller city, half the year i ride my scooter around so i thankfully don’t have to deal wth transit or elevators and the people in them. makes for entertaining blogs though. the human race is definatly a quirky one. keep writing, ya kill me.
ReplyDeletescince i already commented once today i’l keep this short. just looked at your daughters drawings WOW what a talented young lady she had a wide range of styles going on there it’ll be interesting to see her art work evolve as her emotions and experiences change. for her i will write what my faves are. . . Mystic gaurdian, blood knots ( tortured, but its like she’s looking past the masks people wear), Battle wounds(love the fairy like quality), Aya(beautiful, much different then most of them), In need of prayer(evoking)Braids, Mirror image(shy somewhat concealed, is that her?). You go girl ! you’ve got an amazing out let for how you feel don’t ever stop.
ReplyDeleteHi Fabulicious! Thank you very leaving such a thoughtful comment on a space- it’s the first that’s made me think about myself. I read some of your blog, and you have good insight in a straight to the point approach. I think your message’s challenged me to some extent because my parents have always been the type that’s sheltered me from hard stuff. Now the question I have to ask myself is can I walk the walk and actually do something meaningful out there instead of focusing only on school and work and entertainment. I have a long way to go, and I’ll keep what you have to say in mind. Take care!!
ReplyDeleteFabulicious you have such an amazing way with words I’ve never seen anything like it in blogs. Unfortunately I’m not the guy in the profile picture with the hockey helmet- that’s Ilya Kovalchuk of the Atlanta Thrashers who’s my fav player and I better clear that up because other people have also thought that was me!! Anyways, thank you for your suggestion, it would be good if I had some talent in sports but I think get the gist- pick something that I can offer (ie. like a tutor or something cuz I’m good at school) and it’ll be worthwhile to spend some time with youths who may have it rough…. Hey by the way I love getting comments too so I definitely don’t mind for sure!!!
ReplyDeleteI like to stand behind older ladies and see how much small change or tin foil balls I can tuck into their big hats before bursting outlaughing orgetting caught. That was a long time ago, and it’s just because I got out of the murky-aired city.
ReplyDeleteGlad you liked the hatstuffing. The poem though was more of a"zing!" toward a girl I met online. Really liked her — turned out that she had a whole itinerary of trips setup with other guys she "had to meet". Turn off. meh
ReplyDeleteHi there!I found your site through Teresa’s (justme1978canada_bc). :) Very nice!!! I loved it…fun, and serious at the same time. :)-David / BootJockey
ReplyDeleteHi there! :)Thank-you for the nice comments on my site! :) If I do happen to get a nice picture of the sunset with those colors in it, I’ll remember you. :)The one that I have on the site is a special photograph to me, as I took it on the first date with my most recent love, at sunset, on a mountaintop. Beautiful photograph, isn’t it? All "My Nature Photographs" are available in prints, if you are interested. I sell them matted and framed, or just matted, if you prefer.If your interested, let me know!-David
ReplyDeletethis was fun to read! :P
ReplyDeletei hate odour of any kind..esp armpit and mouth!
it's an eyesore to see what so-called fashion do expose....different shades of buttocks with strecth marks!
why wear a brassire then, if it does not hold teh brest firm??
Courtsey is the watch word, which is lacking in our daily dealigs with fellow humans.
Hilarious yet sound!
ReplyDeleteOn the hairy chest thing... even I, a man, dislikes seeing hairy chests uncatered for; how much more a lady...
Thanks for sharing.
- LDP
Ah, the joys of public transport. I have to use it too so I feel you.
ReplyDelete@Ibhade oh i feel you sister with body odour although we all have it, we all don't manage it well and be the recepient of a fowl smelling person is an assault on the senses.
ReplyDeleteSloppy breasts is one of my major peeves, it dislike seeing it. I sometimes feel like walking up to the person and saying please fix your bra, you are wearing the wrong kind (which I have done on occassion with women I know well). It is just down right disturbing especially with its lopsided.
Courtesy? huh, gurl the biggest shocker to adjusting her is that many don't put their hands by their mouths when they eat, yawn, cough, sneeze and they seldom offer salutations (good morning, afternoon, night) when you do encounter one that greets you with a salutation you almost in shock and looking around to see to whom they speak.
@LE DYNAMIQUE PROFESSEUR I don't have a problem with it per say as God created us with hair it is just the lack of grooming that bugs me. I mean no one wants to see hair coming out of the ear or nose and a big bush coming out the t-shirt, shirt, trim it down, keep it well groomed, i have see some they are so hairy you want to take a weep whacker to it yourself because it is so wild and untamed.
ReplyDelete@Adura Ojo (Naijalines) Ah but I don't drive. I mean I can drive you crazy but thats about.
ReplyDeleteLOL!!! Very well said in a very nice manner. :-) I too hate the nose and ear hair. No micro minis roaming around here but I will keep my eyes open for one.
ReplyDelete@Beth As for the nose and ear hair please I am not saying shave it but please trim the damn thing I dont need to be publicly subjected to it.Oh Beth do you know how disturbing it is to be riding the escalator after a long tiring day only to look up and see some woman's bare ass in a thong that isn't clean because she doesn't have the sense God gave peanuts to dress appropriately? I don't want to see that, that is an assault to my senses for gripes sakes.
ReplyDeleteLOL since i also dnt have a car, i can relate so well to this post! u meet the weirdest people on public transports *sigh*
ReplyDeletePS: i'm blogging at my blogspot sight again sso do u mind adding it to your blogroll? thanks :D lol
Public transit sounds like a force to be reckoned with, you certainly make the most of it though. Thanks for keeping it REAL.
ReplyDeleteI’m ducking in to say hello. I hope you had an awesome weekend. Have a great week!!
@kitkat Hmmmmmm “weird” is kind of a harsh term I like to think of them as ahhh…eccentric? Yes eccentric. Sure I’ll add your blogspot blog to my roll.
ReplyDelete@dellgirl Yeah some days its a trial, practice for the tolerance and patience level. Thanks for checking in and the well wishes for the week.
ReplyDeletePeace.
LOLLL!!!! Some of the things that you say are so true....!!!! Yeah going by public transport puts us in such close proximity with others! You know in India it is so crowded in a bus and imagine if a five foot someone like me is wedged between two hulks who are holing on to the over hanging strap.. I get the complete whiff of all that comes out of their arm pits!!!!!
ReplyDelete@Meera Sundararajan eeeeewwwww, have mercy, I feel for you. ooooh weee....dang.
ReplyDeleteReading your post made me remember my days in NYC when my only option was public transportation there was always something hilarious or completly off the wall occurring. Last year I was visiting and there was superman completely clothed in all his gear riding the train and performing. He even did photoshoots with the riders... Well now I drive in to work everyday and miss the "people watching" so much. Thanks for sharing....
ReplyDelete@Lady P it certainly puts a perk in the day.
ReplyDeleteew ew ew ew on the all hairs and coughing thing but sooo on point! Some people even spray you with spittle when they talk so i tend to lean back a lil.
ReplyDeleteI can not stand the smoking ish, like seriously if you're gona smoke, do it far away from me thankyouverymuch
This is one of the reasons i hate shaking people cos you never know where that hand has been.
p.s. i love the way you respond to bloggers's posts. u always seem sooo er..wat's the word...smart and composed.