Jul 3, 2011

13 3 Sheets to the Wind & Flying Stupid

alcoholHave you noticed that fun has become a six letter word for STUPID? I often hear people talking about going to clubs and having a blast, yet they cannot recall a single moment of  this   “supposed”  FUN pass the fifth beer or any other alcoholic beverage. i.e. “fun” it seems is the key term for getting drunk, plastered beyond cognition.  Interesting isn’t it?

What I want to know is since when did being 3 sheets to the wind (drunk beyond memory) and flying stupid (impaired judgment), boasting about a killer hangover fun? Whatever happened to going out with good friends enjoying each other’s company, sharing outrageous experiences, laughing till tears run down your cheeks and your stomach hurts so much from laughing so hard you could hardly stand up straight and when you part ways you are left with a silly smile fixed on your face from the delightfully hilarious evening/night? Since when does FUN equate drinking beyond thought? I have had my fair share of encounters with drunks and let me tell you it was not pretty nor was it fun. In fact FUN is the last descriptive I’d use to designate the experience, ugly would be more apt.

Some people under the influence of alcohol presume they are the life of the party when in fact they are just plain sad, pitiful and plain out of control as their carriage, behaviour and actions all paint them in a very unfavourable light and that's putting it nicely.  In a word, ugly.

One such ugly incident occurred years ago on a Sunday afternoon. I was standing in the line of a McDonalds waiting to purchase a couple of ice cream cones for my daughters when this drunken man in his late thirties of aboriginal decent with scraggly unkempt hair that hung helter skelter on his head who with enough sense God gave peanuts made an nuisance of himself harassing people. I stood there  and prayed silently, ‘Lord please don’t let this man approach me and our girls, I am in no mood, please let him not see us, please Father Jesus I do not want to lose my cool.’ Of course life being what it is and God ever the teacher in teachable moments, the man decided to turn his attention on me. “Hey lady,” he slurred, “I like yuh,” he half laughed and half snickered,  “hehehe” as he drooled and slobbered on himself. I looked at him said hi and asked him politely to leave me alone. I guess that was the wrong approach because he launched at me and I just had to get very serious very fast. I side stepped his attempt to touch me, got in his face and screamed very loudly “BACK OFF!!!” He cowered in fright and appeared to sober up instantly, lol, lol, if I wasn’t so angry I would have bust out laughing from his terrified expression. I frightened my kids too because they have never seen that side of me. Needless to say, mister am so drunk I suck my own slobber sleeked away quietly like a thief in the night.

At least for my children it was a good source of amusement for them. They laughed for days and had constant re-enactments of the scene which would result in another fit of laughter. It just annoys the bejesus out of me when people allow themselves to become so inebriated that they are not only a danger to themselves but to others as well. I mean damn, why can't people hold their liquor or not drink at all why do they have to subject their inebriated self unto others, can somebody answer that for me?

While people have the right to do to themselves whatever they like in their own self-governance without any input from me or the rests of the world however the buck stops short their lack of self-control/governance  intrudes, impacts, affect and threatens to alter my life along paths I have no desire it being it then I have a say, know what I mean?


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