I have a nasty habit of holding my pee. I will sit for hours, completely absorbed in whatever task has captured my mind, ignoring the very vessel that allows me to do the work.
It starts with the Tremors. This is the second sign the body sends out; I start at the second because the first sign—the gentle nudge—is almost always ignored. When I finally move, it is a desperate performance: the shakes, the wobble, the swing, the shimmy, and the squat. If anyone witnessed it, they’d fall down in side-splitting hilarity.
Lately, the warnings have become even more intimate. I’ll get signals right through the middle of my palms. I can actually feel the need for release there—a strange, sharp urgency—and I find myself massaging the center where the ache resonates, rubbing my hands together as my body frantically tries to get my attention.
I’ve had "accidents" before. But as I sit here now, feeling that familiar vibration, I realize that "accident" is a reach. An accident implies a lack of control, but this is a conscious choice. I am choosing to stay still while my body begs for relief.
It is a kind of self-abandonment we must be careful of. We learn to stop listening, ignoring the beginning signals only to be forced into a terrible ending we could have foregone.
I’m going to go listen now, before the choice becomes a consequence.
0 Comment(s):
Post a Comment
You Are Enough. Right here, Right now, In this moment, YOU. ARE. ENOUGH!
By All Means Speak Your Mind. However, Please Observe These 3 Basic Rules.
1. No form of abuse is allowed, everyone is entitled to their point of view (pov) as we all see and articulate the world differently, be respectful and speak without offending.
2. Please stay on the topic of discussion
3. Agree to Disagree
So what say you?
Note: All content here are mine unless otherwise noted. All photographs are taken by me again, unless otherwise noted.